You are not what you think you are. An individual with a solid grip on life? Think again. More often than not your life is run by a set of values absorbed from your family house. It is incredibly difficult to break free from the patterns sculpted early in the childhood, bordering on the verge of impossible. Consider this, if any of your parents dealt with their problems the aggressive way, you would also be more likely to accept that particular weapon to use in some unexpected situations.
The famous or rather notorious statement ”my way or highway” issued together with an angry display of power basically closes the way to some peaceful resolution when discussing things with a relative or a lover. What really matters is how flexible you are at handling some uncomfortable truths, difficult people and so on. Flexibility is tough for control freaks that find it immediately hard to see things from another person’s perspective. It is mostly fear they are driven by and no vulnerability allowed that stem and drag from the early childhood promoting dysfunctional behavior and rigid thinking patterns. And so the circle closes. But that is mostly devoted to those personalities shaped by controlling parents themselves. What helps those average and less than ordinary?
Empathy and Meditation
Our life is mostly spent on autopilot, with thousands of gestures borrowed and modelled on our parents and other close relatives, thinking patterns and also reactions, which get hardwired by the time we enter the adolescence. But as the research has shown human brains keep evolving and the young teen’s brain is fully capable of making yet another leap, not only of faith, and develop further. New theories claim how neuroplasticity of the brain is possible at any point in our lives, in other words, human beings are adept at evolving at any point in their lives, though, for obvious reasons, the older you get the harder it becomes to alter anything that is deeply ingrained. Once you get the hang of how things could work out then you stand a higher chance of remodelling your life. Now the two paths are recommended, the two that merge in the midst, namely, that of empathy and metta meditation or lovingkindness. Empathy normally develops in the early childhood but as we age we choose whether we can employ empathy to serve us in any situation, family or social surroundings.
Now with the power of meditation you could choose to reverse some nailbiting patterns of ill will towards the others and look into their brain, thus, enabling you to take power over yourself and charge over your emotions. Same applies to any habits that are crippling so when you analyze what it is that makes you tick a particular way and see through yourself, the easier perhaps it will be to put an end to any unwelcome behavior that plagues you relentlessly. The most successful people, success being not only financial but also in terms of personality, would have a word or two on that, undoubtedly.